A Tangled Love Affair
by Night Strider
Summary: Kogure confronts Mitsui as the latter returns to the team while in Ryonan, Sendoh continuously pines for someone. MitKo,MitRu,SenKo.
1. Default Chapter

A Tangled Love Affair

Disclaimer: I don't own SD boys, Inoue does. The events that followed are not included in the original plot but enjoy anyway.

Summary: Kogure confronts Mitsui as the latter returns to the team while in Ryonan, Sendoh continuously pines for someone. MitKo,MitRu,SenKo.

A/N: I'll be away starting on March 18, and between this date to that I'll be taking my Finals exams (tomorrow included). In any case, it would probably take me a long time before I upload the next chapters so I'm really, really sorry. I'll be finishing this maybe next month after I take my internship and all; you can wait, I hope.

This is for ivyblusummers. I promised to make you a SenKo, right?

Chapter I

_There's something more rejoicing in what's lost and found than what has never gone astray—Iris Murdoch_

He returned, not so much as a product of inner confusion as a mountain of disgusting inconsistency; the former being his typical excuse for his abrupt diversion, whatever that might mean. He wouldn't, doesn't, and never will see himself as someone completely deserving of the right blame, but only someone who lacked the single-mindedness of a composed person. Probably because his name happened to be Hisashi Mitsui, and that name was rarely associated with things 'done unwittingly'; rather they referred to it as 'juvenile faults conceived with so much pressure.' Sure enough he was pressured, being the captain of a championship team back in junior high and a super rookie of a young promising team called Shohoku High, but there sure was something more to being a paragon than just being plainly idolized and being unfamiliar with the phrase 'no admirers'. Moreover, he was liked and adored. Actually he was loved by many, and not simply loved in terms of brotherhood like what team mates have for each other. He was _loved_ by someone. And that someone was never strong, never could stand up for himself, as people said. Kiminobu Kogure didn't give much thought to it though, unless he came to connect this 'weakness' with what he had for Mitsui because it seemed only too obvious that this very thing drew him to that blue eyed lad, who was strong and, in almost everybody's eyes, excessively masculine. And strangely and ironically, the other liked him too, and must have probably loved him with his half explicit hints that in one way or another gave the full intention behind them. In consequence, they had become a mere contradiction; but not a serious one. A funny one would've suited them better.

That was for a very short time. Mitsui upped and went without giving any logical explanation why he ever chose to quit basketball and in lieu of that obsession, chose to go motorcycling with Tetsuo's gang, trampling his own dignity at such degree. He said he wanted to leave the team 'even if it meant leaving his skin behind' but it never occurred to Kogure that he would altogether leave the sport. He then suspected that Mitsui only played the game with such passion without knowing if that was what he really wanted to do. But considering what kind of hell Mitsui had gone through just to play basketball in Shohoku, Kogure expelled his suspicion; Mitsui was in love with Basketball. When he left the team only did so little to discipline him; indeed, the members only mourned his departure as their ultimate effort to comfort their loss and themselves. Kogure wondered and learned that he wasn't the only weak one in that team. Not that it's supposed to be an ego booster but somehow he wasn't as troubled as what was expected of him. In fact he survived. There WAS life after Mitsui after all.

2 years went by and they reached their final year in Shohoku. He saw Mitsui regularly and was never deficient of news about what had gone on about him. From what Kogure had been hearing, things didn't fare better for the former MVP star who now sported a long, gangster-style haircut and a habitually semi-opened school blouse. But he wasn't sure either if things had been worse for Mitsui; he seemed happy with his 'new' friends, if we put it socially. Surprisingly though, he had been hotter than ever but no more as physically compact as he had been, meaning he might've no longer possessed that athletic charm but had acquired a new one fitted for the new age; that rugged good looks. Kogure secretly grieved for this and realized, little by little, that he could no longer keep up with the fiction of his nonchalance. Apparently, he still cared for Mitsui, much as he denied it to himself since there was no one else to deny it to, except for Akagi. In the earlier stages, Akagi was attentive enough to Kogure's tight-lipped unhappiness; a thing which only his perceptiveness could detect. He had persuaded Kogure to keep Mitsui out of his mind and only once (out of 100 times) had Kogure admitted his hurts to him, indirectly however.

'You're losing your focus on the game, Kogure. Forget him.'

'And what shall I remember then?' Kogure retorted almost angrily.

After that there was no further talk about Mitsui. But Kogure was pained as always, though there were times that he thought he wasn't, times when he wouldn't let anyone have the pleasure of seeing him afflicted. He strove to make a meaning out of his sadness when all this time the attempt had been nonsense itself because he shouldn't really be forgetting Mitsui. Not anyone who had been Mitsui's lover should or could forget him even if it means yearning for what's not. He was unforgettable, and his memory was just like an encircling cloud to Kogure that grew denser as time rolled on.

Finally, just months after their last school year opened, Mitsui returned with the help of newcomers like Sakuragi and Ryota who knew totally nothing about him. But as Kogure predicted, it didn't turn out as a relief. His erstwhile contempt for the situation (of being always unable to make it to the nationals for the last 2 years because of Mitsui's absence) had returned, but this time to himself; caused by being weak and incapable of forgetting. Mitsui seemed changed, though it wasn't a complete shock that he should be so, as a matter of fact, it was understandable and almost anticipated by the others who knew him. But this change only distanced him from Kogure, the creator of the bad connotation of being changed. He mulled over it and could've told Mitsui that if the latter intended to torment him by coming back, he might've been more successful than what he thought. Now Kogure had started to think that what happened in the past, counting their relationship, shouldn't have happened at all now that it had been disconcerting him big time. It was true that Kogure shouldn't have loved Mitsui but come to think of it, it was equally true that Mitsui shouldn't have loved him too. To have thought of each other as lovers, to have fantasized about it was okay; but to have done it…Christ! Kogure had asked what made Mitsui come back and the latter replied, as if he was never acquainted with Kogure, that:

'I've waken up to reality.'

_How totally not enough that is. _Kogure thought and he ceased nurturing any hope of reliving Mitsui's concern for him. He was heart broken as usual; he had experienced it, was experiencing it now, and would experience it when he had given his damnest not to. And now, the prodigal son had set his eyes upon a rookie. Kaede Rukawa, of all people. That too indifferent, even almost comatose charmer had charmed the whole school and now he had to snatch Mitsui too. Great, just spell great.

Kogure harbored a certain silence following that; a silence that had an enormous weight of story in it. Before, everything he did was with care and now he was agitated and nervous of what might come between Mitsui and Rukawa. He felt the destruction from within and felt it with the infinity of 2 mirrors facing each other.

TBC

A/N: that's the first chapter. It wasn't much of a story; rather it was a re-narration and recreation of Mitsui and Kogure's life in Shohoku. Okay, my plan should be a secret but of course, knowing me, I'm going to make it a MitRu too, and that's not a secret, correct? But it's going to be a SenKo as well as promised. Err, I probably lost any touch of writing fiction because for the last 100 years since I last wrote a fic, I've been writing hard, straight news for the school and you know what news are like; simple sentences without any sense of art in them. So just give me time to bring it back, okay?

Thanks for reading. Have a nice day!


	2. Chapter 2

A Tangled Love Affair

Disclaimer: I don't own SD boys, Inoue does. The events that follow are not included in the original plot but enjoy anyway.

A/N: Thanks to the reviewers; I really appreciate your nice comments. It's not like everyday that people have the patience to read my works, you know. And to ivy; hell yeah, damn news stories.

_My love is like a stone tied around my neck; it's dragging me down to the bottom; but I love my stone._Anton Chekhov

At first, Mitsui thought of him as someone he had only dreamed about, someone he'd never attempt to touch. But circumstances afforded better chances than that; at his first rehearsal, he was able to make physical contact with him, to exchange a few words of introduction, and even to register to his memory what kind of body spray he used. It was a little funny that he would squander so many thoughts about Kaede Rukawa that very same night as he buried his head on the covers together with the heavy pictures inside it. But of course it was even harder to fathom why he should ever think of him so anxiously. As a resort, Mitsui didn't bother digging up the reasons; he just went on nursing that attraction without knowing if he was planning to make it permanent. He told himself that there were parts of it that are essentially hard to find out, and some that he wouldn't know at all. Like if Rukawa had ever felt the same at first glance. Naturally, the freshman seemed indifferent at being ignorant about it or maybe, he knew better underneath this snobbishness; what with Rukawa's face permitting only a limited range of expressions. Something told Mitsui then that Rukawa was only trying to be evasive while being very aware of him. But still there was always a possibility that what seems to be isn't always as it is.

It mattered little, however; if it didn't count at all. Yeah, it didn't count if Rukawa wasn't in love with Mitsui. What was in the scales was that he would fall in love with Mitsui in one way or a difficult another. And Mitsui could find that way and operate on it rather effortlessly, and if he chose he could take the roundabout route of it for the sake of protracting the torment. Or so that was how his popularity was defined.

'Hi,' Mitsui said one time during dismissal. They were in the parking lot and Rukawa was in the point of unlocking his bike. Mitsui smiled and continued, 'I can fix that for you.'

'What?' Rukawa said, puzzled.

'That chain. I see it's broken.' Mitsui said. He was referring to a certain damage on Rukawa's bike without even looking if there was any.

'Nothing's wrong with it.' Rukawa said blankly.

Mitsui returned a confused stare at the freshman as he let his eyes fall on the bike; to his surprise, it was perfectly fine.

'AAARGH! BASTARD!' Just then a female's voice rang shrilly from the other end of the parking lot; her finger pointing at a pink bike that seemed to have been run over by a bulldozer. 'SOMEBODY FUCKED MY BICYCLE!'

'Oh, fuck.' Mitsui muttered. A little earlier he had asked his gang to detach Rukawa's bike's chain. He had told them precisely what the bike looked like; it was pink with slender wheels. Apparently, and unfortunately for Mitsui, Rukawa wasn't the only owner of that kind of bicycle.

'That's cheap.' Rukawa said, glaring at the senior.

'Yeah, I'm cheap because you're being hard to get.' Mitsui said with a smile.

'Loser.'

'Well now that you know,' Mitsui flashed a wider smile at Rukawa, 'I guess it's enough effort to earn me a night out.'

'Confound you.' Rukawa seethed, 'Confound you like the bloody cats I run over the streets.' And with the longest sentence he had ever managed, he zoomed off.

Next day.

Mitsui had optimistically slurred the screw-up that happened yesterday. To assert his audacity he smiled a lot, and smiled differently too but never wore one that waves the flag of permanent defeat. _It's fine really; first tries aren't always the best. _He told himself repeatedly until it was the only sentence he had mumbled for the last 2 hours. It never occurred to him that what he did was stupid, an immature act that could've shamed a nine year old. But his self discipline only allowed him to repeat the act in another version; a joke in connection with Rukawa's cuss.

'I got what you mean.' Mitsui mocked him; this time the scene is set in the locker room. 'You love cats. You don't run over them.'

'So what?' Rukawa spat irritatingly.

'Well, you can't confound me like "the cats you run over the streets" because, you've guessed it, you don't run over them.'

'And?'

'Therefore I conclude that you don't hate me.' Mitsui grinned triumphantly.

'I don't.' Rukawa paused. 'Because I loathe and contempt you.' He finished and slammed the door behind him.

'That's nice.' Mitsui said to himself.

'I can't quite tell whether it's just for fun that you annoy him, or do you really…?' Kogure's words rang behind him suddenly.

'Both, maybe.' Mitsui said and faced him. 'Is he really like that? Or is he just being the fastidious bitch in my life?'

'He's like that, alright. But you're being annoying too.' Kogure told him. He was startled to feel that he still wanted to preserve the fading continuity of their past although it had been blurred in Mitsui now. If that was a verified fact, then he was going back to the stereotyped Kogure people knew; the flaccid martyrized image of a fool.

'Yeah, I'm annoying. I always am, you know. But sometimes it gets too tiring to be too honest; sometimes you really have to make things roundabout and funny so you wouldn't bore people that you like.' Mitsui said bluntly. And though he might've meant it the words just came too childishly that Kogure had to give a look of quasi filial concern.

'Everyone loves a goofball but nobody takes him seriously.' Kogure answered solemnly.

'You did.'

'Huh?' Kogure looked straight at Mitsui. _Did he just say what he thought he did? Now how offensively candid was that? _Kogure hadn't prepared for this; he had trusted the supposition that the rancor would be overwhelmed by time. But to bring it up like this, almost comically and meaninglessly, was just un-thought of.

'Never mind. It's stupid of me to say that.' Mitsui said mechanically. Kogure had the notion that the blue eyed boy didn't even realize what his words meant.

'It's not stupid. It's true. But you shouldn't have said it that way.'

'Like what?' Mitsui asked.

'Saying it like it's the least thing that mattered in the world.'

'No I didn't.' Mitsui denied.

'You can say that.' Kogure sighed. 'I just reckoned of it lately; you never seemed to understand how you screwed up this relationship. God, you made me feel helpless.'

'I didn't know that.' Mitsui said, frowning. This time he had assumed a look of deep concern; depending on how Kogure saw it however.

'You never asked.'

'But you never reminded me in the first place. I would've listened to you, y'know. You're different; I can ignore people like Akagi and Hotta but you…I just can't. You want me to mature, alright; I understand that. But did you ever give me the room to mature into?' Mitsui protested. His color rose to a deeper red and he seemed exhausted even if he hadn't had any physical load yet.

'So that's how you see it, then? That I'm an obstacle?'

'I didn't say that.' Mitsui said.

'But that's what you imply.' Kogure said, peeved. 'Listen, I don't want to spoil your comeback by arguing but I want you to know that you didn't have to ask me just to see what was wrong. And please don't allow this affront of mine to be a conduit of your anger because…because I'm not mad at you.' He decided to cut short the rhubarb with slight fear of Mitsui's temper.

Mitsui paused. Something in the wind had whispered that he left a loving heart behind. Here was a person whom he never understood nor tried to, but this very same always did understand him even if he screwed up a million times. The magnitude of his disparity was turned against him and yes, he did little justice to Kogure; and this wasn't the first time or the only time. Ever since, he had been unfair to him. And now what he felt for this man was an unclassified affection felt by many; a mixture of pity and a strange, lingering or perhaps resurrecting, devotion.

'You're making me feel guilty. I hate it. And please don't tell me you're jealous.' Mitsui said finally.

'I am. But what does it matter?' Kogure said, his words' vagueness begging for more literary meaning.

'It does, you know.' Mitsui answered as if surprised by the question. There was a parallelism between them now; Kogure's heart in shreds and Mitsui's conscience hewn to bits.

'Nothing matters besides Rukawa. I've seen how girls go like that, like you.'

'You say so. But I'm not yet sure; I'm still in the early stages of enchantment, so to speak. As of now, well, could anyone really say that I like him as much as I liked you before? I can't really say that's true but…it can get true. I need time.' Mitsui said.

'I'll give you that time, fine. But be sensible; Rukawa's as hard as a kettle. If you can get him softer I'll be there to salute you.' Kogure said in a warning tone.

'I know, I'm not blind, you know.' Mitsui broke a smile. 'And why are you assigning me what to feel for him, huh? I don't remember lecturing you about your dear Ryonan _guyfriend._' Mitsui teased.

'Sendoh? Who the hell told you that?'

'Connections.' Mitsui winked at him.

Mitsui might've been the first to waddle out of the door because Kogure recalled being left alone before catching tune of Ayako's whistle. He remembered Akira Sendoh, a sophomore from Ryonan High, and this guy had been bumping in to Kogure in instances that accounted for more than just plain coincidences. Since that bedamned practice game…yeah, that was how it started. And now he had imagined that face, imagined it with that plastered infamous smile that seemed as natural as his folderol. Akira Sendoh, how good did it feel to say his name aloud?

TBC

A/N: I plagiarized a couple of lines from Charles Dickens and Maxim Gorky so don't sue me, okay? Thanks for reading. Have a nice day!


	3. Chapter 3

A Tangled Love Affair

Disclaimer: I don't own SD boys, Inoue does. The events that follow are not included in the original plot but enjoy anyway.

A/N: to Yelen; Hahaha! You got me there.

To ivybluesummers: Sorry for the super late update. You know, I feel like annoying someone that's why I'm going to put the Christian name before the family name in defiance to Japanese Traditions. And oh, also against the correctness of someone we both know so well.

Chapter III

_Love is never any better than the lover-_Toni Morrison

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

Getting over Mitsui is like compelling oneself to inhale the poison of his own breath. It isn't exactly a crime; it's more like smoking, gradual suicide as they call it. To die slowly because of the sorrow, to survive on a drama that eats up one's sanity till he's ready to give up anything he has besides Mitsui because nothing else really matters without the latter's presence; and Kogure was only too intimately familiar with that kind of feeling. It happened daily, hourly and momentarily. He had wanted to get rid of it many times, Lord knows about it; and he knew he had tried so hard. The shackles wouldn't break, however, and it remained; Mitsui should always be there, someone impossible to get over with, someone whose permanence resembles that of the universe and its omnipresence. But NOT getting over Mitsui is altogether a different thing; to subsist in its happiness which isn't precisely real.

Delusion. That's the pat word. To harbor a certain joy whose greatness proves illusory, where it still lingers like cobwebs amidst the forlornness of a once lively house that is Kogure's world. Sometimes the breathing world and its brutality are almost unbelievable that an alternative should be created. Lies for instance; lies that are made to look like facts over time. Kogure had often been a victim of such desperation just to escape the scars made by the fast fading world that Mitsui had built with him. It was too hard to get over, much as he wanted to do it. Of course he would've loved to forget, to forget and not to forgive but he was weak, and only those with steadfast hearts are capable of that. And he wasn't about to act heartlessly because that's just not him; he might as well argue with Nietzsche in German.

But he met Akira Sendoh, and there are times when he forgot trying to forget, and when he remembered it again; it no longer brought the same weight it had prior to that meeting. He never really believed that time could efface anything because it did not, empirically. Only inexperienced song writers say that. And fuck knows he was too experienced. But events could blur it or rather, blur Mitsui from his mind to the point that that frustration seemed to stereotype itself to his view. Thus getting over simply becomes a purpose neglected with no appalling consequence in being so. It no longer hurt as it used to.

He met Sendoh during the proposed practice game, and immediately guessed that Sendoh and Rukawa would end up in some cute restaurant after the match. On the contrary, the 2 exchanged bitter farewells and probably some unrevealed physical aches gained after too much of pushing and harsh body contacts. But his own goodbye to Sendoh was smile ridden, not so much so it hid too many meanings; it was just friendly and almost routinely. They met again in front of a sports outlet in Kanagawa mall. It was a Saturday, a bright one.

'Hey. You the guy from Shohoku?'

'Yes. Kiminobu Kogure.'

'Akira Sendoh.'

'I know that.'

'Alright. This store's nice, you know. They offer apparels in lower prices and some of them you don't see in branded stores. D'you always go here?'

'Not really. Just once with my brother; we bought a pin.'

'A pin? Well that's a weird choice from a large variety of choices.'

'Yeah, we needed the ball inflated once in a while; saves money instead of buying a new one every time it runs out of air.'

'Right. Hey have you seen the new kicks they got from New York? I've been checking them out all morning and couldn't get over that yellow Nike Turbine.'

'I haven't really,'

'You should see them. Let's get inside and maybe we can grab something to eat later.'

Sendoh almost dragged Kogure inside. The Ryonan star didn't like talking about the weather which is a lame prototype excuse to extend a conversation, nor did he find the subject on his basketball life amusing. He had told Kogure that he could enjoy being a star without anyone yakking away about it and he was sure that everything that would be said was nothing no one had ever heard. He was just probably tired of it and would rather sit quietly to indulge on his personal musings than to exhaust his jaw on words.

They ended up eating in Wendy's that afternoon. After 2 hours of what they called 'cool time' Kogure stood up, looked at his watched and then to the door, until he gave the final hint that it was getting late. Sendoh smiled a faint one that remarked his mood; reluctance to let the other go but Kogure said it was really time to leave. They parted and exchanged phone numbers which Kogure found rather silly, and 3 days after he received a phone call from the sophomore. The conversation lasted in a relatively long duration. They talked about the movies, the NBA, Pachinko's, and even about food. They talked about their lives, hobbies besides basketball, and even their friends which wasn't a very exciting topic to both because their friends were who they were with everyday. And on their next meeting they did the same; same old talking, idle chit chat which seemed to interest the younger boy despite its irrelevance, not to mention redundancy. But when they said goodbye Sendoh gave Kogure a kiss. A rather light one that was neither friendly nor too suggestive. There was mutuality and normality in it that failed to give them both any actual meaning aside from the reality that this wasn't going to be their last meeting, and would probably be even entailed by many, many more meetings from then on.

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

Months later…

Kogure couldn't say if his emotional links with Mitsui were gone and nowhere to be found; but he was sure that he needed to tell Sendoh of his past and of Mitsui, now that Mitsui had returned. And he did that; he told Sendoh everything without having to put so much effort of fighting back the tears. He said that he had gotten over the ex-MVP (ex-boyfriend, ex-gangster) for some time when they were apart but he did say too that this homecoming was troubling him. The idea of Mitsui going back, that is. But Sendoh smiled again,

'Well, if you want you can get him back,' (!)

'What?' Kogure almost exclaimed before glaring at the sophomore. 'You're letting it just like that?'

'No; I'm giving you a chance, perhaps…'

'What if I don't want that chance?'

'Well, that's exactly what I want to hear from you.' Sendoh said and grinned.

Kogure smiled too and held the younger boy's hand. Maybe worrying over Mitsui shouldn't be much of a pain.

TBC

a/n: oi, ivy, eto na ah. Medyo panget pagkakasulat kase iniisip ko pa kung ilalagay ko yung naisip ko. Hahaha!


End file.
